Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
