I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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