We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
high people should be assigned attendants
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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