Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
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