No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
