i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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