my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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