I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize