we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Holy sore nipples Batman
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
