I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Randomize
