there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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