I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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