Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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