Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
What changed your mind?
Being sober
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
