I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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