im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
These tits shall not be calmed
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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