"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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