Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
