i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
