I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
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