I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I just want to make out with him forever
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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