How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
