I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I see more hoeing in ur future
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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