On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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