halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
