I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Randomize
