I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
