Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
