Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
