Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
