I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize