I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I accidentally had phone sex last night
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
