u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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