I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
