it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Randomize
