If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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