Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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