i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
