I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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