ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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