It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
