Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
