I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
is wine microwaveable?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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