i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
