So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
