i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Randomize
