I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
