I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i can't believe i had my finger in that
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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