Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Let's paint friendship bongs
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
