If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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